Sweet sweet, little man! I still cant believe you are 5!!!
I wish I could see you the way the rest of the world sees you: as this vibrant full of life spunky ornery 5 year old. I'm trying sweet boy, trying so hard, but all I see is that sick little baby fighting for his life day after day and a momma helpless to do anything about it. It's not fair to you!
They tell me he's doing great, he doesn't need any extra help! That is music to my ears, it really is, but what if we're missing something!
They tell me don't worry so much, that its in Gods hands! I know, I'm the one that gave that sweet baby back to God all those years ago. But what if these past 5 years have just been a test and the bigger trial is coming.
They tell me kids like him have a rough start, they grow out of it! Then why do I see stories of babies whose mommas thought they were doing good and then bam their gone from this world. What if that's the other shoe for us.
I'm not posting this so you'll stop telling it to me, I just wanted you to know what it's like for me. Living in this world, where you have to be the one to keep it realistic, to always at the back of your mind remember how he started his life.
If your a momma struggling with any of this, your not alone!!!
We are to help carry one another's burdens, I'm here to help you with yours!!!
Please don't take this personal, I'm not singling any one out! I just needed to feel the weight of this lifted off my chest.
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